Thursday, December 11, 2008

Communication is the Key


Ever since I have started this blog, I find myself thinking about blog post topics a lot. When something exciting happens or I hear something funny or especially if something is bugging me, my first thought has now become, "I should blog about it!" So this morning, when I should have been concentrating on getting ready for school, my mind was swirling with what I should blog about next. Well, I have been reading this one book, and this morning as I was reading, I was getting so frustrated! Something had happened to this one girl, and rumors were being spread about her that were completely untrue. Her fiance heard the rumors, and confronted her about them. However, instead of letting her explain, he jumped to his own conclusions about what he thought had happened and drove away in a huff, leaving his bride-to-be crying and begging him to return. I just wanted to reach through the pages of the book and shake the guy! I mean, WHY did he have to leave before she could explain what had happened??!! I have discovered that this is yet another one of my pet peeves - miscommunication!! Last year I was watching a movie with some friends, and as the movie dragged on for hours, I was just getting so annoyed! I literally yelled out, "Just communicate, people!" I mean really...what could have been solved in the first 10 minutes of the movie dragged on for what seemed like 5 hours! If they had only communicated, things would have just been soooo much simpler! That often bugs me about the books I read. In this one series, it takes 5 books to finally conclude the story. If the main characters had just communicated in the first place, it would all have worked out soooo much better! Did you ever think about how much movies & books are made up of miscommunication? Many authors and producers would go out of business if there was no complicated miscommunication issues in their stories! When I read a book or watch a movie, I always see both sides of the story, and I know what the truth is, so it is always frustrating to me when the people involved in the issues just don't see the solution! However, when its a real life situation, it is soooo easy for me to jump to a certain conclusion about a matter. It could be the simple fact that someone didn't say "hello" to me that day so I think they are upset at me about something. Or maybe I heard a rumor about a person, and instead of searching out the facts on the matter, I immediately assume its true and judge that person based on that rumor. I am a girl who tends to over-analyze matters a lot, and I second-guess people's words or actions towards me. So like I said, I am not one to judge others in their lack of communication! I guess I am just saying that I see that it is a real problem in our world, and especially in our churches. Christians get into so many arguments and disagreements simply because they didn't search the matter out and communicate with each other. They jumped to their own conclusion, and obviously, they think that what they think is what is true. My Dad always says that there are 3 sides to every story: your side, my side, and the truth. Throughout elementary school, I always was in the middle of some little "cat fight" with my friends. Many a day would find me in the girl's bathroom having this "meeting" about so-and-so who did this or said that. I always seemed to be the middle man/peacemaker. I would always be the one they would come to and tell their side of the story. Even now when I become this "middle man/peacemaker" in a situation, I just find it sooo disturbing because I never know what the real truth is! Every one has their own side to the story, yet I can see truths from both sides. I just think that if people truly communicated with each other, and didn't come into the conversation with their mind already made up about what they were going to believe about the situation, I think lots of problems would be solved! Communication is indeed the key! However, many people don't want to let their guard down, set aside their pride in believing that they are always right, and learn to trust others (I am preaching to myself just so you know!). One of my favorite Christian authors is Elizabeth George, and in her book called Loving God with All Your Mind, she writes this:

What kinds of thoughts do you tend to have about people? I doubt that they are always pure, positive, and prayerful. Which one of us hasn't slipped into second-guessing, analysis, and suspicion? Which one of us hasn't been plagued with self-doubt or crippled by negative thoughts, insecurity, and worry? A woman choosing to think on what is true and real, however, depends on others to tell her and on God's Spirit to show her when she fails or offends someone. She refuses to second-guess or draw conclusions about people's behavior. When we think no evil about people, trust what they say and do, and believe that either they will come to us or God will reveal to us where we have offended them, we will nurture love and confidence in relationships. Thoughts about people, which are based on what is true and real, liberate us to generously and joyously love and serve one another.

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